Skip to main content

Me and my destructive ego - The unproductiveness of my own destructive ego

Me and my destructive ego

 

Me and my destructive ego

have paired up for a long time.


Of course, I know

good and well

what would be right,

because I have a conscience

living in me too

and often enough

get told about it

from the outside as well.


But I can ignore all of that

with my destructive ego

and go my own ways.


That is why I have preferred

this kind of friendship

for a long time.


I recognize after the fact

all the things I cause

and most of the time

utterly regret it.


But my destructive ego

is quick to rationalize everything,

come up with excuses,

blame others for it,

and plan the next action.


Grabbing everything

I can get ahold of,

quick pleasures,

lust, satisfaction no matter how,

the striving for power

and the numbing of myself

when I get stressed out, all

I have learned

from my destructive ego.


Oh, what a spectacle

my ego acts out for me.

Unfortunately, there is

no happy end in it.


Perhaps I should

slowly start to think about

how useful and helpful

this partnership is

for me in reality.

 

 

(1609120030-0042, 1609122124-2147)

 

 

Talmud, Avot 2:2

Ethical living and humility require curbing ego-driven impulses; moral and spiritual development depends on self-control.

 

 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The second problem - PTSD (Post-traumatic stress disorder)

The second problem I have a problem, or so I thought for a long time. Something bothered me immensely. Whether it was: suffering, illness,  injustice, bullying, abuse, loss, or anything else that threw me off track, what's certain is that the pain of it was etched into my mind. I got incredibly upset about it, simmered with anger and resentment, shrouded myself in self-pity and depression, occupied myself with all sorts of distractions, and did all sorts of things to try and get rid of the pain. Soon I realized that the thought about my problem had become lodged inside me, like a bird that has built a nest  in my tree. I'm starting to brood over the negative feelings. Day and night, they give me no peace. I'm getting so worked up about this terrible situation that I'm constantly preoccupied with all sorts of possible and even impossible scenarios. Soon, I'm experiencing increasing difficulty concentrating. Coping with everyday tasks becomes more and m...
Post a Comment
Read more

Information about the posts in March 2026

All posts posted in March 2026 have a specific order to them. I have placed them in 3 different categories: 1. The Problems 2. The Considerations 3. The Solutions Posts, that will be posted after March 2026 do not have this order, but will be posted randomly only sorted by the time they were posted. It is my hope, that the reader realizes, that he/she is not the only one struggling with a certain problem. I have spent much effort going into the depth of each problem with the hope that the reader can identify with it. Over time I have come to realize that the way we react to problems in principle is timeless. We all get stuck with the same or similar reactions. At the beginning those reactions are rather unproductive or even destructive.  It is my goal to not only honestly write about different problems, but also give the reader, who is seeking solutions good thoughts to consider. I do wish for each reader to read the lyrics with an open mind and contemplate what is wr...
Post a Comment
Read more

When the soul cries out - Emotional pain

When the soul cries out   When the soul cries out then the head is full with pain. When the soul cries out then it is obvious that you cannot concentrate. When the soul cries out then the everyday routines become difficult. When the soul cries out then any contacts with the outside world become more and more difficult. When the soul cries out then you become more impatient with yourself and others. When the soul cries out then you need a lot of love and comfort  in order to heal again.     (1606121555-1912,1706120737-0747)     Psalm 147:3 (The Israel Bible) He heals their broken hearts, and binds up their wounds.  
Post a Comment
Read more